i won’t lie. daily. it gets harder and harder to go into the studio or even the kitchen table to make art. i have wanted to be loose and generous with my idea of making. i still do but i have less and less motivation. i realize this is just life–i have a house, chores, a toddler and growing very near due date…i’m tired.
so, when i heard about one book july i was sort of on the fence. so, naturally, i tormented my husband talking about it. no doubt, he rolled his eyes and probably fell asleep after a while but he looked interested when i looked at him…so there’s that.
should i do another challenge? is a question that i seriously ask myself. i usually fail at them. however, i watched the video about the rules, there are none and decided that i could try and work in one book for most of july. this does not mean that i will do work everyday but i can try and maybe it will kick off into a habit. my art journaling has been very paint heavy for the last few months and i like that. however, i actually have been craving a bit more writing on my pages. it feels weird and i don’t even know what to write about. so it’s all a jumbled mess of words on a page but it feels good. so i will try things out and see what happens.
yes, i got a new journal because i am journal lush and Micheal’s gave me a coupon to feed my addiction. i got the 8X5 ranger dylusions creative journal for about the same price i would have gotten it at dickblick (which is where i will be getting my refills should this habit catch on). i have the larger size and like the paper but the book is not as portable as i would like. so naturally, that is an excuse to buy the smaller size. yes, i try to rationalize these things. lol.
i am still working in my sketchbooks off and on. they are paint heavy. i use a vareity of brands. i could and should write a post or do a video on that because it’s the ultimate geekdom. mostly, in them i use acrylics as a base.if i collage, it is from old paintings. i feel that they are different than my art journals but it is probably all blurred and doesn’t even matter. i am still using loads of pastels when the mood suits and sometimes working on sheets of paper. it is enjoyable but it is not the same as writing. i miss writing. hopefully, this new/old approach will be the best of both worlds.
i am not pressuring myself to be an artist. or even to share my work online. i am an artist. i am creative. it twist and turns. it expands and contracts but i am as i am. i create for the same reasons i blog–my own self-development. it’s that simple and maybe, that selfish.
naturally, i don’t know what life will look like in a few weeks, with a second baby at home. of course, i am excited to find out but i do think that i will have to retool my creative expectations. i hope that a small 8X5 journal is accessible to me during this time. i don’t expect spectacular art. i am not trying to be great. i just trying to keep the practice alive. i may share more of my work regularly here and on my lovelyquiet instagram account…because i do like the conversations and geekiness of the art journal community. i mean who else is going to get excited about new journals and paints? lol.
who knows? i just don’t want to get caught up in trying to keep up. i don’t want to be caught up in performing the role of artist online. or any other role. i want to share what feels good versus feeling obligated to share for the shake of sharing….that’s just not a life i can live. these days.
on another note, if i get time, sooner or later, i want to write about how painting has been a force of good in my life. maybe some research about art and healing.
creating art with paint and all her sisters has been so healing and continues to be healing. if all i get from it is healing vibes, that is the gift of a lifetime. if all i do is encourage you to find an art expression you love and devote some time to it—then maybe that is enough sharing. i don’t know. it’s best to keep a loose hand and open heart about these sort of things.
after all, this part of the story is unwritten/being written.
1. i will not be posting my daily progress here or on social media…that always equals failure for me and it’s too tiring.
3. the one book “rules” video
4. an artist residency in motherhood. i have been loosely following this outline over here since January. creating when i can.