creative practice / self compassion

it’s OK

it’s been an interesting week. lots of waiting. waiting for baby (not here). waiting for deliveries(not even shipped). waiting for news ( i don’t really want to hear) and phone calls ( that are really hard to hear when your phone is on do not distrub :(. ) lol. of course, this is really nothing to complain about but i […]

creative practice / self compassion

revolution in the heart

“create whatever causes a revolution in your heart” — elizabeth gilbert on january 7, 2017, i began my artist residency in motherhood. i was not sure what that meant. i just knew that i had to begin. i still don’t know what that means but i just know i want to continue. i didn’t have a huge or really any […]

self compassion / writing

rising with mystery

these past few weeks have been all over the road emotionally, mentally and physically. i’ve not tried to contain or explain them (in great depth) but i have tried to be honest with myself about what is happening. one thing that keeps coming up is my “need” to control all the things and the fact that i have very little […]

self compassion

what do you need?

  sometimes, i ask my son, in a far too annoyed tone “what do you need? today he turned around and asked me the same thing? what do you need?   i mean really, what do i need? i can have a day full of everything i want and still i am moody and gnawing on invisible bones. what do […]

self compassion / writing

waiting

These day feel slow and fast ticking. Like a collision of breathlessness and endless waiting. Waiting in the distance between spaces of who we will become. Waiting for Who I will become again and who I will be anew.    A small pile of weeks to keep me company. A small pile of worries to dissolve. To hide under. Unless. […]

self compassion / writing

the conversation

this week I had one of the realist conversations of my life. You don’t need to know the particulars to know that it ended in tears, heart-felt stories shared, apologies and some very loose ends. the conversation, itself, was a major victory. the loose ends can be expected. loose ends should be expected. i know that we live in a […]

self compassion / writing

wide-open hearts

yesterday was one of those days, where i completely lost my sh*t for a few moments. oh, it was nothing huge but it was a mix of a pile of frustrations and sheer tiredness (a dangerous cocktail for me). it was one of those moments when i thought all my hard-won progress in a certain area was just evaporating and […]

self compassion / writing

writing and healing

writing these days seems challenging. the words are just not flowing but then i wonder when they last did. and if that even matters. sometimes, when i write i think i am suppose to have all the answers but i am slowly seeing that writing really just brings up more questions. one of the best things writing has given me […]

self compassion / writing

your courage

your courage is pounding inside the fire/let it rise up and consume you/let it heal you/let it remake your edges wider and softer/ let it drop you beyond your own knowing/into the center of uncertainty and flames/your inner compass will roar with the added pressure/ the stillness will teach you/let it/ you are becoming more you with each breath/ you […]